Emotional effect

[Badger]

@JamieMarc fair play to you for dealing with the confrontation with dignity. It sounds like you are dealing with awful stress at the moment. Confrontation can be a horrible experience on top of our symptoms. Do take care.

 

[JamieMarc]

@SBee
(Breathing) Ahhhhh LOL
Thank you!

 

[SBee]

Crikey (another English word for you to practice with !!) @JamieMarc careful my friend, breathe less! Haha. Can feel the effect from here like a hurricane!

Hope things are better and clearer for you today.

 

[JamieMarc]

@SBee thanks for the big laugh. That's one of the reasons why I love coming to The forum in the morning when I wake up and have my coffee and water. There is always someone here who brightens my day, and frequently that person is you. Crikey! LOL

Hey, I have not forgotten about our private convo. Just requires a longer more thoughtful response and I have not been ready for that yet. Please forgive me.

 

[SBee]

Nothing to forgive my friend @JamieMarc you know that. I am busy compiling a book of English words and phrases for you, and not all of them are rude. I shall mark the really rude ones as such, so you can use them appropriately and not frighten those who offend easily ( which, as you know, can never describe me.)

Glad to be of service in some smiles and laughter. We all need a lot of that as some days the pain gets a grip and won't let go. In my bid for ' normality ' I did far too much in the garden,cos it was so beautiful to be out there. Result of course fatigue and pain. Because I am still getting to grips that this is now my normality, not as it once was. But that's ( mostly ) ok. It's a new normal, my now normal if you like, and heaven knows I've seen a few of those in the last few years.

 

[barbara lowcock]

i think i may be an Empath too, I woke up from my small amount of sleep a couple of days ago crying over the dying Elephants in the African drought.

 

[Auriel]

i think i may be an Empath too, I woke up from my small amount of sleep a couple of days ago crying over the dying Elephants in the African drought.

Oh @barbara lowcock , my neighbour had a programme on about the rainforest (there was literally a bald patch where people had been cutting the trees away (i nearly started bawling! It's just ridiculous!, saying that, I was sensitive child too) back to front "again" but WELCOME TO THE FORUM!

 

[SBee]

Today I had the radio on hearing about a woman who lost her husband, and father of her young children. She was describing the love and comfort the family dog gave. I was already tearing up then the presenter played a cello version of You'll Never Walk Alone. That was me really sobbing at that point, just thinking of the smaller family unit together holding onto each other.
And the cello, played well, always hits me right down to my soul.

It's the price we pay it we are of the caring type - in that we can feel empathic hurt and pain.

 

[JamieMarc]

s the price we pay it we are of the caring type - in that we can feel empathic hurt and pain.

I am seeing posts here about empaths. I did not scroll up enough to see how it all began, but I had to chime in because I have been this way all my life. Not just feeling empathy for all living things, crying easily and openly, or being called overly sensitive, but actually feeling another's pain, and being able to sense, often without words, the character and principles of other people.

Anyway, I just had to add my two cents and let y'all know that I'm the same way.

 

[BlueBells]

@JamieMarc

re empath, I can't remember how it started either

I am not as sensitive as you, but I do wonder if we are just more sensitive, maybe the better word would be connected, with the world, nature as an whole.

A few years back, we were driving by open mines, massive ones, and it was like I felt the soul of the earth crying. It was so ripping into me, and that was something I never expected.

I think I am more attuned to nature moreso than humans, and I think we are individually more targeted to particular things. I've taken pets to the vet, and I just know something is amiss. One vet said to me I pick up things at the start, some people only notice when the animal falls over and they think, "oh, something's wrong" without having noticed lethargy etc for some weeks, as an example.

I just thought, are fibromites (from a meme ) more likely to be empaths, and is it possible that some of the pain etc. is the response to the sensory overload?

@SBee @Auriel @SweetWithSour @Badger what do you think of this theory?

 

[SweetWithSour]

I just thought, are fibromites (from a meme ) more likely to be empaths, and is it possible that some of the pain etc. is the response to the sensory overload?

@SBee @Auriel @SweetWithSour @Badger what do you think of this theory?

I do know that I'm empathic. It's something I try to watch and protect myself from taking on other's feelings.

Some may say it develops out of trauma the want to read the situation, try and make everything better. Peacekeeper/people pleaser.

Some say it is a gift. A way to connect with people and better understand them.

Some say it's mirroring.

I don't know the why, but I do know what it feels like.

I personally think fibromyalgia is a VERY sensitive, easily triggered, 0-60 in a second, hypersensitivity. I think that foods, environments, emotions all have a connection to the fibro. Maybe adding fuel to the fire. Things then get so complicated, intertwined, fused together with fibro it's hard to separate and put in buckets. Living in almost a constant state of flight/flight/freeze/fawn the adrenaline and body preparing had a physical impact and a chemical one.

A support group, helping people may also increase the likelihood of having more empaths.

Just my thoughts, nothing backing it up. Pulling from my experience and observations

 

[Badger]

@SweetWithSour that is well put thank you, I agree. It's really awkward trying to help matters while getting caught up in the vicious cycle with Fibro.

 

[BlueBells]

@SweetWithSour

I think you might have it in a nutshell, pretty much.

I'm not sure if I am becoming more sensitive or the world is just getting worse, thanks to people

But, this is the world we live in, and this support group helps so much. I checked in on a mental health site I joined years ago (after a really good one closed) but , you know, it doesn't feel "right", it isn't what fibromites need, because, fibro isn't just depression, or anxiety, it is more complex and it doesn't fit their 'boxes'.

I understand fibro is different and similar for everyone, but for decades I've been self-convinced my depression is from 'within me', not a chemical imbalance , therefore not helped, but actually worsened, by anti-depressants, so I steer clear of them.

Since I was diagnosed, mid 2019, and I learnt as much as I can, I am of the opinion that fibro has its own little cloud of depression, borne from the frustration of inability to find an answer to all the "whys" fibro throws up. I find that I only feel depressed now when it is related to frustration, led to by fibro taking me out and upturning my plans, or things out of my control, eg, world events.

 

[SweetWithSour]

I'm not sure if I am becoming more sensitive or the world is just getting worse, thanks to people

@BlueBells I think we just have more exposure to what I call noise. Click bate headline selling tragic news, technology (I'm on my phone all the time click click click scroll). Even noise can be the temp, lighting, clothing/touch and the everyday sounds.... I think it triggers our hypersensitivity.

Controlling your environment can be really important when healing. Setting boundaries is critical. Sometimes we need to unplug get in a dark quiet comfortable place and just enjoy all the noise turned down.

I also think once that trigger is flipped, we can still be on edge and we never settle right back to baseline, thus the easy to trigger again.

I've been self-convinced my depression is from 'within me', not a chemical imbalance , therefore not helped, but actually worsened, by anti-depressants, so I steer clear of them.

I very much understand this my anxiety amplified drastically with my tumor-induced osteomalacia. The depression fed by the pain. My psychiatrist and I spent maybe a year and a half to find the right stuff. Taking something for my anxiety was what was needed. I don't metabolize and tolerate many medication (super metabolizer or can't metabolize at all). My psychiatrist did a genetic test to get my med profile. Learn what works, and doesn't with my system.

If we think of fibro like an acceleration on a car, it is like our foot is slammed on the gas, then lightens up, then down again. It is a jerky ride. It also is a big energy waster and can have a big impact on the central nervous system, sympathetic and the parasympathetic nervous system. It's almost like a short circuit

Since I was diagnosed, mid 2019, and I learnt as much as I can, I am of the opinion that fibro has its own little cloud of depression, borne from the frustration of inability to find an answer to all the "whys" fibro throws up. I find that I only feel depressed now when it is related to frustration, led to by fibro taking me out and upturning my plans.

There is a sense of loss with fibro. What once was, the fear of what will lost in the future. Not only is exercise/movement/stretching, eating well, and drinking plenty of water/fluids, sleep, exercise and building up our mental health is soooo important. We need to fill ourselves back up! Add tools to our wellbeing toolbox that includes mental health. Building and replenishing should be a constant cycle. It helps us adapt and adds to our resiliency.

 

[BlueBells]

@SweetWithSour

There is a sense of loss with fibro. What once was, the fear of what will lost in the future.

Yes, I agree. However, for me, I've found the diagnosis and ensuing knowledge has actually freed up my thinking/attitude.

Gone are the endless doctor and counsellor visits trying to figure out what is wrong with me. Gone are the frustrating answerless whys, why do I lose track while working, why do I lose energy, why can't I do what everyone else does, why can't I keep up, why do I get 80% or 90% of a project done and suddenly like hitting an invisible force field, I come to a complete stop.

I now know why. It has a name. Others have the same or similar issues. I am not alone. I am a people. Just like all the other people, different, but still the same, just a people. It normalises it all. I have a foundation to work from. Maybe as unpredictable as the weather, but, I have a foundation, and it is fibromyalgia

I am learning, gradually, to work with, and not against, the little gremlins, and that alone lowers a lot of anxiety and general stress for me.

The depression I get is a "clean depression", I can see what causes it, and I know how to deal with it. Limit triggers for a start, and that ranges from don't look at the news, to not pushing at work when I need to stop for a bit. It certainly does not always work, but at least it is on my own terms, I am learning to control it.

By the way, 'work' also ranges from doing the paid work, home-based secretary, thankfully my own hours, to washing the dishes, or clothes.

So long as the cats and I are fed and watered, and litter trays done, there are times when I must accept, that is the days limit. To accept and not beat myself up with "should be doing this or that", I find I recover more quickly. In a perfect world. It's not always that perfect