random thought

[pandoralys]

Hi there, so like many people here i'm guessing, I have hyperalgesia and I hate, like hate hate hate when people touch me (eg hugs and all), cuz makes me uncomfortable (on top of people pressing on some pressure points sometimes). I was randomly wondering if the both could be related or not ? between not liking people touching you and fibro, or if it's just me and some sensory thing

 

[sunkacola]

Many people find that, due to having fibromyalgia, simply bumping into something which normally wouldn't cause any notice will cause acute pain. For some of us this is always, for others it is only sometimes. I find that for me that comes and goes, and I never know when it will be in effect because it doesn't necessarily correlate with days when I have increased pain in general. So, yes, sensitivity to being touched or bumped or to small things like slightly stubbing a toe is definitely linked to fibromyalgia but the severity of it varies from one person to another, and also for some people it varies from day to day or week to week.

As far as not wanting people to touch you as a psychological issue, that would be separate from fibromyalgia, unless it developed as a result of having people's touch being a source of pain.

 

[MissNeverWell]

Hi there, so like many people here i'm guessing, I have hyperalgesia and I hate, like hate hate hate when people touch me (eg hugs and all), cuz makes me uncomfortable (on top of people pressing on some pressure points sometimes). I was randomly wondering if the both could be related or not ? between not liking people touching you and fibro, or if it's just me and some sensory thing

I have both a heightened sensitivity to pain and pressure/anything touching my skin, along with psychological issues to being touched, which are unrelated to the former. Sometimes I'm okay with hugs, particularly if I know and feel affection for that person. At other times, especially when I'm upset, I cringe at being hugged. There have been occasions in the past where it would actually hurt, because the person was much stronger than me or resorted to "bear" hugs.

 

[sunkacola]

I have both a heightened sensitivity to pain and pressure/anything touching my skin, along with psychological issues to being touched, which are unrelated to the former. Sometimes I'm okay with hugs, particularly if I know and feel affection for that person. At other times, especially when I'm upset, I cringe at being hugged. There have been occasions in the past where it would actually hurt, because the person was much stronger than me or resorted to "bear" hugs.

If you cringe at being hugged, I suggest you avoid it completely!
You are allowed to to that. You have that right.
I always avoid it, because I am simply not a "touchy-feely" kind of person, and resent it that a total stranger assumes I would want bodily contact with them.

I didn't know what to do about it until I met someone years ago who has osteogenesis imperfecta. Being hugged by someone could actually literally break her ribs. When someone comes towards her, she holds out a hand and says "Very gently, please. I break easily!"

Now, I don't do that because it would be lying, but seeing her do this made me realize that I have the right to refuse to allow a stranger to touch me if I choose. So, if I don't want to be touched, I move back, and say something like "virtual handshake, please" with a nice smile, and I hold my hand out and move it up and down in the air. Or, I might even hug the air in front of me and say, "Virtual hug!".

I find that if I do this with a nice tone of voice and a smile no one ever takes it badly. I did this long before the Pandemic, but it is even easier now post-Pandemic.