coping with having a job

[Susan123]

Bless your hearts all of you. I have been through the same thing. I had to retire teaching in 2010. I had only taught 15 years. I started later in life, because it was later in life I went back to school to get my degree. I have Fibromyalgia, lupus, and Sjogren's. The principal one minute would act as if she was trying to help me some, and then the next day as if she had never said such a thing. I was under so much stress, with pain and no energy. I was scared too in a major way. My husband was not working so I was the only one, but I came home one day and said I couldn't do it anymore. Poor or not, food or not, that was it. We live on a very tight budget now that leaves little for emergencies or anything. My car is on its last few days literally, and I don 't know what I will do. I am still here though at 61.

 

[painismylife]

the truth on ground is that it may not be easy to combine a job with this ailment because it is quite a peculiar one but the fact still remains that if you really want to excel with your job with this ailment there are certain challenges you have to overcome

Joshua, I will go ahead an apologize in advance if something I say in this response offends you, but there was something in your post that offended me.

The truth on the ground is that it IS NOT easy to combine a job with this "ailment" because it really is "quite a peculiar one." More truth for the ground is there are times when it is IMPOSSIBLE to combine Fibro and a job.

Because jobs have demands, deadlines, typing (which I am doing right now with a total of 4 fingers and thumb, because one hand is almost completely numb and the other is in enormous pain), customer service where the clients want to see smiling faces, not pain filled grimaces. Jobs come along with stress, heavy lifting, crouching, reaching, sitting in one position for hours, or constantly moving. Some jobs demand unerring accuracy or critical thinking every time you clock in. And this peculiar ailment does nothing more or less than become an invisible parasite that saps all the good things you have to offer out of your life, making it absolutely impossible to hold down a job.

Now I am only speaking from my personal experience. Maybe I have it worse than some, or maybe I am just a wimp. But know this. With every ounce of my being, I wish I were able to overcome the challenges that fibromyalgia put in front of me. I wish I were able to 9 to 5 it until I dropped dead. I am 34 years old. I was a hard worker. I did my fair share plus some. And now, I feel like I am 80. So, Joshua, for some of us, the reality- the soul crushing "truth on the ground" is this very peculiar ailment cannot be combined with a job. And sometimes... it cannot be combined with a life.

 

[Gelsemium]

I know what you mean, depending on how we are feeling sometimes the most simple task can be hard to perform, so I don't think no one can judge us really.

 

[angelstar5]

All, I started with vitamin D deficiency, doctors did not check, which started with back muscle pain and weakness. I couldn't reach for anything and my spine and ribs would get out of place. My level is up ( should be 30, I was found at level 13) now. As of last fall, I was finally diagnosed with Fibro and can't even pick up a gallon of milk. I still have pain in my ribs, especially on my right side and feel like they want to poke out. Does anyone have these problems? I have to visit my Spine MD, (not a chro crack) and he either reworks my muscles or I get a needle treatment. Does anyone have this going on? I am trying to keep positive. I was laid off and unemployment is so strick about fraud listings. You have to be able and available. I am job searching and some people say not to tell interviewers. I believe if I don't and they find out, I will get fired and then no unemployment. I am the bread winner. I read brief articles that say tell your boss and co-workers so they know and will accommodate you. Yeah right. so for now I just tell employers that I have a bad back, and cannot lift over 3-4 pounds. While still unemployed and finding it harder to find a job I can apply for that I can do, ( VA unemployment threatens you with fraud and jail and finds if you do anything fraudulent in sending in your listings. does anyone have the rib pain. I use to have horses and they were given to rescue last year. Like a lot of you, I feel my life has stopped. I have a 71 yr old husband who is a severe asthmatic and between the two of us, (I am 57) we barely get the trash out each week. Please share you pains and do they push on your ribs? Yes I get tingles down to my hands. My SI get out of wake too that is from the horses and shoveling snow in the good old days. Lastly, my spine doc keeps telling me to read the book Unlearn your pain. It talks about the negative thinking that we have been taught since childhood. I was abused and it keeps haunting me subconsciously. I use to take a lot of pain and thru surgeries, but this pain and ribs feeling to bust out and the fatigue, one can only share with others who know. thank you all for sharing and please tell me your story.

 

[Trellum]

The truth on the ground is that it IS NOT easy to combine a job with this "ailment" because it really is "quite a peculiar one." More truth for the ground is there are times when it is IMPOSSIBLE to combine Fibro and a job.

Because jobs have demands, deadlines, typing (which I am doing right now with a total of 4 fingers and thumb, because one hand is almost completely numb and the other is in enormous pain), customer service where the clients want to see smiling faces, not pain filled grimaces. Jobs come along with stress, heavy lifting, crouching, reaching, sitting in one position for hours, or constantly moving. Some jobs demand unerring accuracy or critical thinking every time you clock in. And this peculiar ailment does nothing more or less than become an invisible parasite that saps all the good things you have to offer out of your life, making it absolutely impossible to hold down a job.

I couldn't agree more with you! There are day I just don't want to work at all, even tho I do it from home, but there are days I just want to lie on the bed and do nothing but watch TV. I sometimes make a huge effort to get everything done tho, but it isn't always easy. Just the other night I couldn't' complete some assignments on the deadline because I fell asleep... I didn't know what hit me, I just was soooo tired I just let go! I don't even know when I fell asleep! I just know I did!

Working with fibro isn't easy... no physical jobs for me at least, and definitely no customer service!

 

[JKerner59]

I totally understand!

 

[Lana]

To my Supervisor, Don't direct that look at me, Do not turn up your nose. You don't know me, This is not the life I chose. Please do not judge me until you walk in my shoes, they are made of lead and hurt my feet its like walking on screws. You tell me that I look sad and I should smile some more, but you should try smiling when all of you is sore. I wake up every morning not knowing about today which part of me will work and where the pain will stay. My brain is all fuzzy it's not me being dumb it's just the Fibro fog makes me forget what Ive just done.

 

[Lana]

I saw this poem online and I thought it was perfect. I wish I gave it to my Supervisor.

 

[terbaer]

Good one Lana! Amen!

 

[JKerner59]

Joshua, I will go ahead an apologize in advance if something I say in this response offends you, but there was something in your post that offended me.

The truth on the ground is that it IS NOT easy to combine a job with this "ailment" because it really is "quite a peculiar one." More truth for the ground is there are times when it is IMPOSSIBLE to combine Fibro and a job.

Because jobs have demands, deadlines, typing (which I am doing right now with a total of 4 fingers and thumb, because one hand is almost completely numb and the other is in enormous pain), customer service where the clients want to see smiling faces, not pain filled grimaces. Jobs come along with stress, heavy lifting, crouching, reaching, sitting in one position for hours, or constantly moving. Some jobs demand unerring accuracy or critical thinking every time you clock in. And this peculiar ailment does nothing more or less than become an invisible parasite that saps all the good things you have to offer out of your life, making it absolutely impossible to hold down a job.

Now I am only speaking from my personal experience. Maybe I have it worse than some, or maybe I am just a wimp. But know this. With every ounce of my being, I wish I were able to overcome the challenges that fibromyalgia put in front of me. I wish I were able to 9 to 5 it until I dropped dead. I am 34 years old. I was a hard worker. I did my fair share plus some. And now, I feel like I am 80. So, Joshua, for some of us, the reality- the soul crushing "truth on the ground" is this very peculiar ailment cannot be combined with a job. And sometimes... it cannot be combined with a life.

Very well said.

 

[Lana]

Yes I agree that was very well said, it is to bad that she has to justify and explain herself to someone on this Forum. That is heartbreaking!

 

[trayne91]

Yes, it is hard. Even though I am so grateful that I can maintain an income from home, that doesn't mean there still isn't problems. I never wake up on time. I'm tired all day. Some days my hand and fingers have so much pain that I cannot type and that is something I need to do all day. My back and neck may hurt. I may have 8 hours of work to do at my computer and even the back of my legs touching my chair hurts. It just plain hurts to even sit. Some days it's so bad, I cannot sit in a chair. Last winter was horrid. I cried almost every day in complete agony. I get brain fog really, really bad, too. I forget to call clients back. I forget to do tasks. I try to write them down, but sometimes I forget to write them down. Sometimes I do work for one client on another account. It's humiliating. I've forgotten phone conferences and meetings for new business. I just realized today I never sent a proposal for a client for new work and I said I would do it over 2 weeks ago. And, it's not getting any better. I am afraid at some point in the near future that I won't even be able to hold this down because I am just going to make too many mistakes and not even be able to keep up with industry changes. I'm already a year behind on those and haven't done anything for my own business in almost two years now because I can only do my client work and then I can't handle my own. I'm too tired. I'm too sore. I get extremely overwhelmed each and every morning before I begin work because I have no idea how I am going to finish it all before I go to bed. Some days I have bad anxiety and I can't think and my eyes are all blurry and head is in a complete fog and I just can't do anything, let alone think or work. It's sad to think that I went from starting my own business and doing a great job to not even making a company blog post in almost two years and forgetting meetings and proposals to new clients because my brain just won't work to also not even being able to sit in my chair some days. It's hard on my family, too, because if they ask me anything while I'm working I totally freak out because I cannot for the life of me concentrate on two things at once anymore. I have to say "I don't know. Ask me later." I immediately get blurred vision and severe anxiety. I can't remember what I was just doing or did last and it takes me about 10 minutes to figure it out before I can get my mind in "the groove" again. I just can't be interrupted or I get all flustered and off track and I make mistakes. It sucks. It sucks to not be able to multi-task anymore. It sucks to sound crabby at your family when you don't mean to. It sucks to forget. It sucks to have a chair make the back of your legs sore and not even be able to sit. When your whole body feels bruised, well, it just sucks. The positive is that I am hanging on and have the privilege of being at home. The negative is that there are still problems and I don't think I can do it much longer because my brain fog is just getting too bad.

 

[PythonPlay3]

Very well said Lana. I am one that so far I have still been able to work. But let me tell you - come winter here in Canada where I am - is brutal. Just like most of you, there are days my hands don't work and I can't type, my shoulders and back are in so much pain, etc etc. I know people I work with really have a hard time seeing me fall into that Pit. I have episodes in other months, but winter seems to be a whole episode-I have depression/fibo/arthritis. From Nov-March the next year, I look like I am dying most days. I know that one day those "bad spells" will get more and more close, they will get longer and worse. It has been since I was diagnost. The reality is that some day I won't be able to work in winter. I pray every day to make it to 55 working. IF I can do that, then my hubbies financial plan will be on schedule and I can stop working. I am 46 now. There are some days, I don't I will make one more day. Everyone is so different. I have many people I know from support groups, etc that can no longer work. I like what someone said a post or so ago, this disease is like a leach that sucks everything from you and it does. And it is unpredicable! So REALLY before you try to catagorize all fibro's in one group- remember- you can't. You really can't. My heart goes out to those that can't work any longer, because the stress of the loss of income, the feelings of powerlessness is horrible and then those bad days hit, it make them really hard to see past them.

 

[painismylife]

Trayne91- You describing your work day sounds absolutely spot on to the ones I used to have. I was fired from my job because of the Fibro symptoms. I know. I could have sued. But I didn't.

PythonPlay3, you said your heart went out to those who can't work any longer. I am thankful for the sympathetic feelings. It is very difficult to deal with the loss of income, etc.

But my heart goes out to you guys, who have Fibro and are still hacking away, punching the clock, doing all you can do (and some things you can't) to keep bringing the income into your household. I take my hat off to you. You guys are like soldiers, deployed into hostile territory, (And I am not trying demean the role of a soldier at all.) because some of those coworkers and supervisors are extremely hostile! I hope and pray you both are having a "good day" today.

 

[Gelsemium]

My colleague is worse and worse by the day, luckily we have an understanding boss who gives her simple tasks so she can continue here.