Suicide

[terbaer]

Krishna, you are sounding a little better today. I'm so glad to see it and glad you're keeping in touch. Please read my last post and see if you can't get some psychological and counseling support. It really will help you to deal with your pain. Let us know if you EVER have any questions or need words of encouragement....I posted a whine and moan post not too long ago because I was having a bad fatigue day and it was getting to me. Today is another one of those. I've taken to making lists for the week on things I want to accomplish. I've crossed many things off my list this week. I've had two amazing days. Very rare for me. I decided I wanted to try and bake cookies today to try out a gluten free recipe (I'm supposed to go gluten free). Slept pretty good when I finally fell asleep (again rare for me). Unfortunately, woke up with a headache and severe fatigue. I may have overdone it.....Needless to say, I didn't make cookies today.... :-(

Those in the forum are here to help whenever you need it and I always welcome suggestions or comments from others because I certainly don't have all the answers....Gentle hugs Krishna....

 

[Krishna]

Physcologically maybe a little, but my body is definitely not. I also had a very busy week, tried to accomplish more than I can handle and now i'm paying the price. Gone are the days when Used to work 15 hour days. Like you, sleep is practically non existent for me and even when i do sleep, I am all exhausted.
Now i just dread going home on a Friday afternoon to a family who just won't understand me and what I'm feeling or what my body feels like.

 

[lhaney]

Hi Krishna. I am glad you have come to this forum. There are a lot of people on here that go through a lot of the same things with ones family members and or friends that do not understand what you are living with on a daily basis. So please find comfort and information here from people that will listen and try to help you. I know it is difficult but take it day buy day or when it is real bad hour by hour. You will pull through it.

One step at a time, one day at a time with hugs lhaney

 

[minilandrover]

please read my poem i wrote for people just like you when you are feeling so low and desperate.
suiside is not the answer...finding your inner strenght is what you need.. not easy but you can if you try and start to recover mentally bit by bit.
thats what prompted me to write the poem.
i also felt like you do..but have recovered by fighting back..and reached new heights. yes i still have fibro, pain and limitations, but have re discovered how to ger pleasure and satisfaction from what i can still do...by pushing back those boundrys..

listen up tracy poem
now listen up tracy, I hear your pain
you symptoms are getting you down again
you feel so useless, unwanted and stressed
but deep down inside you are one of the best

we all have to suffer in each our own way
pain from fibromalgia that wont go away
so what if we can't do as much as before
do ironing,make beds or hoover the floor

we still have our eyes that beauty can see
the pleasure in others we can share their glee
make fun of our problems cos there here to stay
we still can help others, for them we can pray

so what little i can do, i do so with pride
even if afterward from the pain i cried
but doing things when ever my body allowed
what i can still do, it still makes me prowd

i have learn't how to do things a different way
with a new set of tools that are here to stay
just a few hours hours work and im all done in
but iv'e done my best and with that ill win

ill keep on going and so will you thats the plan
because thats what we are here for to do what we can
so puck us there tracy there is lots left to do
and take one job at a time, you will work your way through

we are not measured by failure, but what we have done
not by the dozen, but one by one
so do what you can do, and do it with pride
don't ever let fibromalgia shorten your stride.

Colin Martin

 

[terbaer]

Hey, I can certainly relate to overdoing. You'll find the balance. Psychologically having a better day is much more empowering than physically. So, I call it a good day when I can psychologically feel like I can deal. Kudos to you. You need to give yourself a pat on the back sometimes.... If you can't I'm gonna! Yay! Great job! You had a psychologically better day (or two)!

Minilandrover, Very nice poem.....I agree, don't let fibro get the best of us....

 

[Krishna]

Hello Fibro Family. I think what makes it harder for me is the fact that i reside in South Africa. Fibromyalgia is not recognised as a disease or chronic condition. Our insurance companies do not pay dread disease or disability (although i am insured for both). Since the government does not recognise fibro either, there is no state disability. The doctors (even specialists) in South Africa do not know much either. All they can do is push strong meds on you or possibly an operation. I have spoken to them till i'm blue in the face, but they don't understand. We do not even have all medication available in SA. This makes it much worse. Wish i could just immigrate to the states.

 

[terbaer]

Okay, Krishna, so you're from South Africa. Let's think about what you can do outside of meds. I'm just going to throw out some things to TRY. If they don't work, you're no worse for wear. Do you have access to Epsom salts and baking soda? If so, use about 1-2 cups of Epsom salt and 1/2 cup of baking soda in a warm bath each evening about 90 minutes before you are ready to go to bed. It helps to draw out the pain and the warmth 90 minutes before bed helps to relax you and gets the endorphin's working which reduce stress. I should do this more, because it does help me.

How about essential oils? Do some research on essential oils. There are some that help with pain, anxiety, foggy brain and more.

Next is diet. Look up FODMAPs. There are foods that help with inflammation, bloating, fatigue and a whole host of other health properties. Again, this is research. Look up Doctor Oz's website. He just did an episode on FODMAPS and posted foods to eliminate. He also explains on his site how to do an elimination diet. I'm looking at trying this. I have several friends that have done it and it's done wonders. I'm also pretty much gluten free even though I'm not gluten intolerant. One of my specialists wants me to try it for 6 months to a year and see if there is an improvement.

Last, various vitamins can help with the different illnesses that come with fibro and chronic fatigue. Magnesium is a natural muscle relaxer. Just start researching.

I have insomnia really bad. Its thought that improved sleep and addressing the insomnia could significantly help with the chronic fatigue and fibro symptoms. I don't know, because I have insomnia. That said, my doc just said he wants me to see a sleep specialist so we'll see.

Again, I'm just throwing out various things to research and try. Something may stick and truly work for you. Good luck and hugs to you.....Let me know if you try something and what you think!.....Ter

 

[Forgetmenot]

please read my poem i wrote for people just like you when you are feeling so low and desperate.
suiside is not the answer...finding your inner strenght is what you need.. not easy but you can if you try and start to recover mentally bit by bit.
thats what prompted me to write the poem.
i also felt like you do..but have recovered by fighting back..and reached new heights. yes i still have fibro, pain and limitations, but have re discovered how to ger pleasure and satisfaction from what i can still do...by pushing back those boundrys..

listen up tracy poem
now listen up tracy, I hear your pain
you symptoms are getting you down again
you feel so useless, unwanted and stressed
but deep down inside you are one of the best

we all have to suffer in each our own way
pain from fibromalgia that wont go away
so what if we can't do as much as before
do ironing,make beds or hoover the floor

we still have our eyes that beauty can see
the pleasure in others we can share their glee
make fun of our problems cos there here to stay
we still can help others, for them we can pray

so what little i can do, i do so with pride
even if afterward from the pain i cried
but doing things when ever my body allowed
what i can still do, it still makes me prowd

i have learn't how to do things a different way
with a new set of tools that are here to stay
just a few hours hours work and im all done in
but iv'e done my best and with that ill win

ill keep on going and so will you thats the plan
because thats what we are here for to do what we can
so puck us there tracy there is lots left to do
and take one job at a time, you will work your way through

we are not measured by failure, but what we have done
not by the dozen, but one by one
so do what you can do, and do it with pride
don't ever let fibromalgia shorten your stride.

Colin Martin

What a lovely poem , how lovely.

 

[nascarmike]

Nice poem Colin. Thank you.

 

[GK40]

Krishna, you have gone through a lot......I am sorry that you had to go through so much suffering. I have been suffering myself since last 7 months, but your pain is much worse than mine. I would suggest trying some natural healing....Ayurveda, Accupressue/puncture, Yoga, meditation......whatever suits you. Prescription drugs help in the short term, but they cause more harm in the long term. You are bigger than your pain, and you have it inside you to overcome this and anything else. We understand you and we are all with you. Keep faith and you will have this behind you some day. Love & blessings.

 

[Brenwood]

Krishna,
I was just diagnosed yesterday and admit to being suicidal for over 2 weeks. I actually feel relieved to get this diagnosis, because I have spent 5 months recovering from replacement of both knees at the same time. Since I suffered a set back 3 months ago, I have had to "tolerate" my surgeon reducing my pain meds, her threatening to stop them, and her blaming the whole problem on my non-compliance. If you are like me, there is a little part of you buried below the desire to escape by death that is still trying to find a way to make it better. I am new to this disease, but what I know is that management (not cure) of chronic disease is often a matter of trial and error. I also know that medication combinations are better than just increasing the dose of 1 pain medication. When you take control of your care, even if your doctor feels you are rebellious, you will quit feeling like a victim. Keep exploring ways to help yourself. Try new things. If you need your doctor to prescribe medication, come to his office equipped with written information about the drug.

Now I am going to expose the ace up my sleeve. Seek out a doctor ( likely a chiropractor) that has class IV laser therapy. I went to the K Laser website to "Find a Physician" who has their machine. One treatment eliminated the acute pain I had in my back and neck after I fell. I had used it on one of my knees before surgery, so I had high hopes. It was better than I expected. That acute pain has not returned but I am going back tomorrow for the original back and shoulder pain which has increased over time. After starting Cymbalta last night and experiencing the blessed relief from it, I am not even sure I need the laser therapy tomorrow. It is important to get class IV laser, not class III or III with any fraction after it. Those don't really help and they give laser therapy a bad name. You should be wearing special dark glasses (not normal dark glasses) during the treatment, so if they do not use glasses, it is not class IV.

Good luck and think out of the box.

Donna