New Member, Hello All

[sdellin]

Hello everyone. I just joined the forum today. I was looking for support because I have chronic pain, anxiety, depression, etc. and things are worse lately than they've ever been.

I was diagnosed back in 2021, but I never knew untill last year when I was at a recent appointment. Why a doctor would diagnose me and not tell me? Who knows.

My doctor was called away for a family emergency and I was asked if I wanted to see a different doctor that day. I was trying to tell the doctor about all my symptoms, which I've had over the years... Many years.... And he said, "You know we have limited time today." I told him I didn't understand how I could ever get to the root of the problem if I couldn't talk about all of my symptoms at one time because maybe they're all related. He responded with, "Well we already know you have fibromyalgia." I was dumbfounded. I was never told that I had been diagnosed. I'd wondered many times because I have a lot of the symptoms, almost all of them.

Just for the record, I am a patient at a military hospital, military healthcare. The government thinks it makes sense to limit each patient to two items to discuss during each appointment. I'm like, um, can I make back-to-back appointments? LOL How can you ever get a diagnosis like that? Doesn't it take more time and resources to make more appointments to cover everything? I don't know. They change your doctor so the time, like annually, at military hospitals. Although I'm grateful for the healthcare...

Anyway, it helps somewhat to have a diagnosis, but it's also more depressing.

So this is me: I retired at 46, I live in the country with my husband who retired a few years ago. I keep my youngest grandson two days a week, overnights, which isn't enough time, but is too much time! I have 6 grandkids all together. Julian, the youngest, and I are best friends. We are so close. I have always been that grandma who actually plays with the grandkids, whether it's Opoly Jr or jumping on the trampoline. But this last year (Julian is 5 now) I've found it much harder to play. Just because I'm in pain all the time, tired a lot, and the depression is really bad. But I'll talk about all that stuff in the general forum.

I have the best life: retired young, have horses, property, a wonderful supportive husband and close-knit family, and I love ranch life. So that's me.

I'm glad you all are here. I need you.

 

[SBee]

Hiya @sdellin, welcome.
Having a bunch of symptoms for so long and not being actually told your own diagnosis is disgraceful. It actually happened to me some 30 years ago when I had chronic fatigue syndrome. Took me almost 5 years to recover with no medical help and I only found out that was my official diagnosis last year. Leaves you with a bit less confidence in the medical professionals, generally speaking I think.

Also the lack of time given to a patient in appts is distressing. I find if I try to prioritise my most urgent symptoms or needs that helps. I am in the UK and my own gp surgery has facilities where a patient can contact them by email. This helps when I have extra questions that do not fit into a face to face appt. The dr can then reply, in their own time, with a phone call or msg back. Dont know if this is something you are offered?

Ranch life sounds a world apart from anything in the UK! The scale of the geography is so different. I love that your home life gives you so much pleasure and support...
And you need us? Well here we are! Have a good browse around at the posts and do ask anything you like, there is so much information, advice and support, I really hope being part of this forum will help give you some of what you need.

 

[sunkacola]

Greetings, @sdellin and welcome to the forum.
I totally agree with @SBee that it is nothing short of disgraceful that you were actually diagnosed and not informed of this diagnosis!! That is actually medical malpractice, the kind of thing for which a doctor can be sued. Of course, it being a military facility, no doubt you are unable to do that, and it wouldn't achieve anything anyway....but I am appalled to hear about this.

Our medical system is dreadful in this country, whether you are military or not, but from everything I hear it is not better in most other countries.

Yes, it can be very discouraging and depressing to receive such a diagnosis....many of us here can fully empathize with this. You want to know what is going on with you, but then being told it's something with no cure and no commonly effective treatments is like a nightmare for many people.

Here's what can help:
You have found this forum, so that's a great first step. People here are kind and open hearted and will offer to you their experiences, their advice, and their support. You can ask questions and get people's feedback. You can come here and just vent and rant and rave to your heart's content any time you want to and people will understand and reply. And you can find out things other people are doing that have helped them. Some of them may help you if you give them a try. People talk openly here about medications they have tried and what worked for them and what did not, and while nothing works for everyone, it's always helpful to hear others' experiences when making decisions on how to manage fibro.
There's a post of advice pinned at the top of the General Discussion forum with a bunch of suggestions and some encouraging words....check it out.

I really hope that this forum is helpful to you. I know it is for many people. Let us know how we can help and we will do our best.

And.....by the way....I adore horses! While I am really a dog person, and my skills are with dogs and dog training, I learned to ride shortly after I learned to walk, and have always loved everything about horses. I have never had one of my own, not ever being able to manage the means to support one, but have ridden all my life when I had the chance, and am always just happy to be around a horse whether or not I ride them. Horses are astonishing creatures who never cease to amaze me with their intelligence, grace, and willingness to be with us despite the fact that we are a predator species that wants to tell them what to do. Be genuine and honest and kind to a horse and you get repaid a thousand-fold.

 

[sdellin]

SBee and Sunkacola, thank you for the welcome and for your kind words. It's nice to have people understand and support you. I look forward to bring around here and connecting with people like me, meaning those who understand this illness.

Sunkacola, I find that even just being around the horses does my heart good. We are just coming out of winter, so I'll be riding more soon, provided this knee hooks out. I will think of you next time I mount up

SBee, I did a DNA test a few years ago and going in 60% British! Who knew! Now I want to visit the UK. Maybe some day.

 

[SBee]

@sdellin 60%British ?? That virtually makes us cousins