HOW do i get them to understand?

[1sweed]

As for your constant pain it sounds like the job your doing would make your conditions worse. Constant lifting and straining, is overworking your muscles to the point of no recovery. Would it be possible for you to talk to your boss about being able to take a few breaks where you could sit down and rest for a few minutes. My job was housecleaning and the hard parts for me was raising my arms up or stooping, and lifting and be constantly on the go. It did not take long before I realized I could not continue doing this 5 days a week. Your body has no time to rest because your pushing yourself and not letting up. If you don't ease up a bit your going to end up bedridden.

Your boyfriend sees you going non-stop and wonders how you can do that if your in so much pain. Men often go by what they see drather than what we tell them. Maybe you should just quit telling him and rest when at home. This stress from worrying and feeling bad is not helping you.

I know when I am upset or worried about something my brain refuses to let it go and it reviews the subject over and over, often all night long. If I don't pray about it I go without sleep and rest for days at a time and can not relax as I am a nervous wreck. So I would say just stop saying anything to him about your fibro. When you get home try the relaxing ideas mentioned in many of our posts. Try to find a mental health therapist who will give you an outlet for your worries, as well as, teach you ways to lower your nervousness and help with ways to handle your problems. And don't let anyone say your crazy for going, as I think anyone who needs a extra someone to help in times of mental and physical pain, is smart for taking the time to get their head on straight. I sought help when my husband was not supportive and let me tell you it was a lifesaver.

Some local support groups are good, but if your a private person a therapist may be a better idea. I hope this helps in some fashion and gives you ideas on how to help yourself.

 

[cinderr]

My doctor has me on something for the neuropathy (tingling) and something to help me sleep and not itch all night like fire ants are biting me. I don't care if it means taking five pills a day; I can't cope on my own! And sex? Takes alignment of all planets to get that done---no fancy stuff either. Crying shame, that.
My husband understands perfectly because he has been having problems of his own---his hips have gone crazy. He is in so much pain, I feel I'm the healthy one. Me, Miss four vicodin a day. But I've moaned and groaned and bent over for years with little sympathy---now he gets it!

 

[cinderr]

I wish I knew how much we should do---do we push it, think we'll overcome the pain? Or do we go slow, rest often? I see a new rheum next week---this is a question I will ask him. I've done it both ways. After 25 days of forcing myself to walk, I woke up feeling like I had five distinct broken bones throughout my body. It took a week to recover. Now I go slow, rest often. I still try to move everyday.

 

[1sweed]

Your question is a hard one to answer. I guess you have to pace yourself and see how much you can do and get to know the warning signs that tell you your doing to much. After a few times of pushing the limit you should be able to tell when you need to back off. Not that it is easy to quit while ahead, as I have learned this week.


I have been doing photography and sitting in cramped positions for an hour trying to get a few pictures of baby fawns. The pic's are beautiful, but the pain in my legs is terrible. But fawns only stay babies for a short time so I have been over doing in trying to get a few photo's.
And now it is blackberry season. Whoa is me! lol

 

[lynn77]

I am so sorry you are having such a hard time. I have had trouble getting my husband to understand also. It's like he forgets sometimes and asks me what is wrong, as if I had not already explained it many, many times.

Perhaps some education on the topic of fibromyalgia would help your fiance. It helped my husband understand a little more when he read about it online. WebMD and Mayo Clinic both have good information on fibromyalgia on their websites. Since both those sites are established, well-respected medical websites, he may be more likely to accept it is not in your head. It is a chronic condition that has to be managed. It does not simply go away.