Fibro Crash
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Badger
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it's an awful feeling when you hit that wall and the sense of isolation after. It can be hard to see life without the lens of depression or pain. There are times when I'd rather be in the middle of nowhere just chopping wood and counting squirrels. Good to read comments from others on meditation, I've been practicing for about three years. Each session is different but overall it's been worthwhile and will hopefully help my wellbeing in future. It's been interesting hearing from practitioners of different forms on Youtube and an app I like to use. @Stiffsister hopefully today is not too bad for you, take it gently and ease into things a step at a time.
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On a page by berkeleywellbeing about Radical Acceptance they link to a youtube video with Lady Gaga talking about it with Oprah 2020, specifically how it helped her come to terms with her fibromyalgia (and trauma etc.) pain and let it "dissipate". She uses the Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, DBT, mentioned above.
She explains exactly how it works for her. The whole interview is an hour, this bit starts at minute 19:14.
Very moving and brilliant, got tears in my eyes. So be careful of your mood before listening, it's extremely intense and personal.
(At 36' says that she took ages to get the diagnosis and her psychiatrist doesn't even call it that he calls it 'neuropathic pain' or similar.... 43' no pain medication = 'narcotics' (her doctor is directed not to allow them to her), only antidepressants, antipsychotic and one more, and everyone's different.)
She explains exactly how it works for her. The whole interview is an hour, this bit starts at minute 19:14.
Very moving and brilliant, got tears in my eyes. So be careful of your mood before listening, it's extremely intense and personal.
(At 36' says that she took ages to get the diagnosis and her psychiatrist doesn't even call it that he calls it 'neuropathic pain' or similar.... 43' no pain medication = 'narcotics' (her doctor is directed not to allow them to her), only antidepressants, antipsychotic and one more, and everyone's different.)
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Badger
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I'll look up that video tomorrow and start over reading up on radical acceptance. Could really do with a foothold. Washed out, sore and only mid morning the other day I thought sod it and followed an hour long deep breathing track. Nodded off at times, felt a bit spacy at times, but felt more settled at least.
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Quite like the thought of counting squirrels badger, you want some company? You can chop wood and I'll count the sqirrels
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Badger
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You got a deal, I have a knack for losing count and would probably end up shouting at them.Quite like the thought of counting squirrels badger, you want some company? You can chop wood and I'll count the sqirrels
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Auriel, you might want also to know that I dance. And not some sort of quiet little hardly moving kind, either.I'm gonna try whatever she's doing! way she dances in the stupid love video, she can dance like that with fibro I'm goinna do and try whatever she is
I also hike, and not long ago went hiking in some very high mountains, including a pass that was 15,000 feet. The main problem I had was breathing at high altitude, but my body was able to do the trek. Not saying it was easy!! But you can do a lot more than you think you can if you really want to and diligently work toward it.
Of course, I have hiked all my adult life. A person with fibro who never hiked before might not be able to condition enough to do that. But who needs to climb mountains or dance if there's something else you want to do? And if dance is what you want to do -- you can!
so I wont get into areas that I disagree with.
That being said, as someone who has suffered with chronic pain since 1977, been rear ended 11 times had 16 surgeries and ton of other medical stuff, like two C spine fractures and fusions , I can tell you that without the benefit of meditating daily for twenty plus years I would not be sane, & who knows what else would have come from my situation if I had not found a clear path to dealing wisely with the situation I found myself in.
The practice of looking reality in the face, seeing the truth of the present moment and not trying to escape, understanding the impermanence of lets say a headache and instead if suffering emotionally because of the pain, but feeling it, taking whatever steps to remedy it but not taking it personally, makes it a totally different experience. This is not about belief in any way shape or form but a defined practice.
When we add the why me to a painful experience we double the problem, we now have pain AND suffering. Without this self awareness I gained meditating I am not sure where I would have learned the skill to see clearly, react wisely and not create more difficulties for myself. Also learning to NOT hate my pain but have compassion for my situation instead of sadness, anger or frustration also changes the experience.
It doesn’t matter where you learn how, but not all practice is equal, like not all doctors or medications are equal. Find the right way to approach this and your ability to deal will improve. I have nothing to sell, just sharing my experience over a long period of time.
That being said, as someone who has suffered with chronic pain since 1977, been rear ended 11 times had 16 surgeries and ton of other medical stuff, like two C spine fractures and fusions , I can tell you that without the benefit of meditating daily for twenty plus years I would not be sane, & who knows what else would have come from my situation if I had not found a clear path to dealing wisely with the situation I found myself in.
The practice of looking reality in the face, seeing the truth of the present moment and not trying to escape, understanding the impermanence of lets say a headache and instead if suffering emotionally because of the pain, but feeling it, taking whatever steps to remedy it but not taking it personally, makes it a totally different experience. This is not about belief in any way shape or form but a defined practice.
When we add the why me to a painful experience we double the problem, we now have pain AND suffering. Without this self awareness I gained meditating I am not sure where I would have learned the skill to see clearly, react wisely and not create more difficulties for myself. Also learning to NOT hate my pain but have compassion for my situation instead of sadness, anger or frustration also changes the experience.
It doesn’t matter where you learn how, but not all practice is equal, like not all doctors or medications are equal. Find the right way to approach this and your ability to deal will improve. I have nothing to sell, just sharing my experience over a long period of time.
Badger
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@Cbreeef66 it's really helpful to hear from someone with many years experience of meditation and chronic pain. It sounds like you have been through an incredible battle and pain has had a massive impact on your life. Pain from a whiplash injury has been one of the hardest for me to deal with and I do hope daily meditation will help long term. I was meant to visit a friend tonight but had a painful migraine last night and don't feel comfortable going out. The nausea and worst of the pain has eased off but my heads sore and tense. It's difficult not being so reactive to pain and causing additional suffering. There have been times in the last few years when I've had a brief glance past it. Your story gives me some hope for the future with practice.
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@Cbreeef66 , The thing I like the most about what you say is that you can separate pain from suffering and a person doesn't need to suffer because of pain. As you mentioned in your first post in this thread, that understanding and practice is monumental is changing how pain is experienced. I wish everyone could come to that understanding. It's not easy at first but with practice it will change how a person views things.
My teacher has said that a question like "why me?" says a lot about the person asking it but is never in any circumstance productive, nor does it ever have an answer.
I love what a truly good form of meditation (such as you are describing) can do for a person. It's not for everyone, though. I tried to do it and was fully on board with all the concepts but couldn't manage to continue it because it was just not my thing, and so after 2 years of daily I quit. Fortunately there are other things that will do basically the same thing. The teaching I follow has made a huge difference for me, and doesn't include meditation although many people also meditate.
I am not surprised to hear that the term "radical acceptance" has ancient origins, although the ancient teaching may have used a different word from "radical". I love the phrase, think it is perfect, and want it to help everyone. While I had practiced acceptance for many years, adding the "radical" gives me a strong reminder each time that nothing, absolutely nothing can be left out of the sphere of acceptance. It has to be everything, all the time. Again, not easy, but well worth the effort. For many people, the right kind of meditation can lead to this.
My teacher has said that a question like "why me?" says a lot about the person asking it but is never in any circumstance productive, nor does it ever have an answer.
I love what a truly good form of meditation (such as you are describing) can do for a person. It's not for everyone, though. I tried to do it and was fully on board with all the concepts but couldn't manage to continue it because it was just not my thing, and so after 2 years of daily I quit. Fortunately there are other things that will do basically the same thing. The teaching I follow has made a huge difference for me, and doesn't include meditation although many people also meditate.
I am not surprised to hear that the term "radical acceptance" has ancient origins, although the ancient teaching may have used a different word from "radical". I love the phrase, think it is perfect, and want it to help everyone. While I had practiced acceptance for many years, adding the "radical" gives me a strong reminder each time that nothing, absolutely nothing can be left out of the sphere of acceptance. It has to be everything, all the time. Again, not easy, but well worth the effort. For many people, the right kind of meditation can lead to this.
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