confused and helpless

I am feeling so confused and helpless at the moment. The things happening in my life feel so out of my control. My boyfriends cancer, my son ( long story I will go into a bit later) Mum and her hip replacement, thankfully she is doing well and is home now. Just feel like I want to crawl into a nice warm hole for awhile but I know this won't help. My boyfriend has quit, quitting and is smoking again, he still won't smoke in front of me and is still trying to hide the fact he is smoking. He must know I know he is smoking as yesterday he stood up to go make a coffee after I have been for my shower and his lighter fell on the floor. He asked what was that and I calmly said its your lighter, it fell on the floor when you stood up. He quickly picked it up and walked out of the room. :?: Right or wrong I told his mother that he is still smoking and has never really stopped, she said she will talk to him about it so I am waiting to see what happens with that. Its poker night again tomorrow night so hopefully some fun is on its way for the family on our monthly poker get together.