I'm sorry you're suffering so much. You're coping with a lot of loss and stress, and that kind of mental agony can make pain even worse.
I tried Cymbalta, an anti-depressant, and found it made my depression much much worse. It also made me emotionally, spiritually, and physically numb. I just stopped caring about everything and had no motivation for anything. Within two days of getting off it I felt a surge of emotions coming back, and I cried a lot, but the crying helped so much to relieve all the tension I wasn't feeling while on Cymbalta. I've talked to several other people around town and online who have all had very negative experiences with Cymbalta too. Another person I talked to doesn't think she has any negative side effects from it, but her back pain has been much worse since taking it and her sleep patterns are very funky. Personally, I don't recommend trying any anti-depressants unless as an absolute last resort. The risk of making things worse is very high.
That said, I do understand the "fibro funk" very well without being on meds. Depression comes easily for me now. I have had some major trauma in my life too, though not on par with losing a parent. Trauma keeps coming back to haunt us until we seek help for it. I used to work for a mental health clinic, and my boss, a psychologist, did some hypnotism for me. It did help a lot, and what's great is that I have a recording of his hypnosis on CD that I can listen to when I need help coping. Mental health counseling has homework, and if you don't do the work you won't get results. So if you can find the willpower to do some work, I highly recommend finding a psychologist. At the very least, a psychologist will give you tools you can pull out when you're suffering.
Personally, I've learned to "force" enjoyment of things. I may not feel like doing something I normally enjoy, but after forcing myself to get started I tend to "wake up" a bit and enjoy it. I've found that video games have been by far the most helpful. They're very gentle on the body, but really gets the mind working. I feel a sense of accomplishment playing them, feeling like I'm able to do something significant and make progress in some form. Giving your mind that type of feeling, even if you're only accomplishing something in a video game, can really boost your mood and give you something to feel proud of. That can transfer to real life too. My favorite games are offline role playing games, because they require the most mental investment and offer the most satisfaction. Simple games like Pokemon are really good too, because it's constant work in a positive direction.
Walking around the block, despite the pain, helps a lot too. I might make the pain worse for a little while, but it gives my mind a break from the house. Grocery shopping for healthy foods, not snack foods that fuel depression, helps too. When the only food in my kitchen is organic veggies, meats, beans, and fruits then I'm forced to eat those things. And I do feel a lot better, because my body is getting the kind of nutrition it actually requires. Also, taking vitamin d3 and omega-3's daily helps a lot. I take the Nordic Naturals Omega-D3 3-4 times a day. It has no fish taste, but I actually notice the effect of it, unlike other lower quality fish pills. Your brain and nervous system require these nutrients to function properly, and they're hard to get enough of without taking supplements.
Also, acupuncture hasn't been helping substantially with my fibro pain (it has helped some,) but it's helped significantly with my sleep and mood. It's helped so much, in fact, that I can go from feeling down to feeling very very positive and happy after I leave. Chiropractic care helps the most with my pain management, and just being aligned has helped my mood too. Acupuncture and chiropractic care require a lot of visits, but honestly, it's the most effective money I've spent all year.
Hope I've given you some helpful ideas!