Can't cope anymore, I need help

[Season]

Hi everyone, my name is Season and I'm new here. This is the first time I've ever been on a forum so not quite sure how it all works. I'm a 35 year old woman who has had FMS / CFS since I was 18. I just can't cope anymore. My entire life has been hell and with FMS / CFS these illnesses have absolutely killed me. Who I was and would have been are dead and gone. I live alone, can't clean my place or afford a maid. I have no friends just my Mom and 2 cats. Physically I can't work but force myself to to my bills. But I've missed so much work lately I'm behind on all my bills and scared that my services may be cut off soon. I'm in a massive flare up for months now with no prospect of getting better as long as I have to work. I'm so frustrated, hopeless and scared. I'm totally trapped. I can't do what I need to to get better because I need to work to pay my bills. I'm a real life zombie and don't know what to do anymore. I can't get disability so once again I'm screwed. I was hoping maybe some of you may have some suggestions. Thank you and sorry for this rambling sob story. Hope your all doing well.

 

[Forgetmenot]

Hi sweetheart , can't your Dr write a letter saying your not fit to work. Everyone around the world seems to have big probs trying to get support from benifits . So a letter would really help.u can't get sacked in the uk for being ill. So if it's the same over there the Dr is the first one u should see, and tell them what u want don't be going in there like a little mouse ,
What pills are u on. I have been on tramadol for a few years when I come off which was a killer I almost felt normal I swaer to God .i felt great for 8 weeks now it's hit me again like a bull in a china shop, so I take them again to get through the day but think maybe I'm better off with out them.
And I guess what I'm saying is you have to get your head around the idea that even though right now your not feeling great but u will one day ,u really got to hang on to that , as I feel once u give up you feel more and more pain.
I also find the less I move the worse I feel. Btw I was in a flare for well over two years before that.some ppl have good and bad days I seem to just hurt the same everyday.but I no one thing the more stressed u are the worse th pain, that's only a help if your super rich and don't have to worry about money.but it does mean u have to find things that help u relax. Or give u something to look forward to.even if that's finding a a group of ppl who enjoy the things u do. Hugs xxxxx

 

[Season]

Thanks so much for your response. I have all the support from doctors and Lawyers but our disability agency flat out and bluntly discriminated against me so I'm stuck. I fought for 2+ years and was denied repeatedly. The medications I'm on are fentanyl, percocet, baclofen, gabapentin and tra a done. I would happily come off everything if my pain could be managed. About the friends part and joining a group, I have no time or energy. Everything I have goes to working. When I'm not working I'm home trying to recuperate for the next week of work. I just feel so trapped. I'm not able to do what I know I need to in order to feel a little better and unfortunately even though I've tried so hard not to, I have given up on the idea that I will ever have a half decent life let alone be happy. All my dreams are gone. The only dream left is that I may one day be a little better.

 

[1sweed]

Season,
Having been where you are right now, I can truly understand your worry and concerns. Do you think you could work online? Could you write articles for blogs or take orders for companies? Some companies have people trained to answer customer questions and others have people set up appointment times for them. Do you have any books or dvd's, or computer games you wish to sell, as there are places online that buy these things. Read Day 7, of my blog and see if you can come up with a few ideas for making extra money.

Another idea is if you have a car could you drive others to doctor appointments or shopping? If you are creative with any craft these things can be sold on consignment at some stores. Get your mind involved in thinking up new ways of earning money that are not overly stressful for you.

Also talk with your bill collector's and explain your problem of ability to pay and try and work things out to avoid shut-offs. Since you are in Canada, I don;t know what agencies are available to help, but others here on the forum may be able to head you in the right direction.

Glad you found this forum and I hope you will come often and post questions or answers to other posts, and learn some good coping skills while you are here. I wish you the best of luck!

 

[Season]

Thank you for your support and ideas. I'm sure I could come up with some ideas to make extra money but I can't do it right now as every moment I'm not working, I'm recuperating. But again thanks for the ideas I may use them in the future.